i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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