Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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