Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
