We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
