It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize