He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
it was like eating out sand paper
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Randomize
