There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
