I just threw up on my dentist
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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