omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
just tell him i said nine months
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
not ubering you a puppy
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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