I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Come on in and take your pants off
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