It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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