Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize