i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize