forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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