dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
