My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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