Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
