tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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