Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I have grass duct taped all over my body
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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