is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
