It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
