It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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