I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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