So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
