After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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