Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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