I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
