just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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