The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
