you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Randomize
