i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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