I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
