I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize