UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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