Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Drunk walkin through police station. America
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Randomize
