what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
My penis needs a shock collar
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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