What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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