Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize
