I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize