I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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