This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
