I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
