is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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