Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
