That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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