is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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