its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
