it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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