normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
