btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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